By Cynthia Vera

Growing up, Dale Vincent Hancock was a victim of physical and emotional bullying which greatly affected how he perceived his value, making him an adolescent without any confidence or self-belief. His tormenting challneign only seemed to escalate when he grew into an adult, experiencing a draining romantic relationship, job losses, a car crash, and more. When enough was enough, Dale decided to take control over his life and use his challenges as a driving force to change and success.

Upon discovering his passions and true self, he finally became the person that he needed when he was in his most vulnerable struggle. Now a #1 best selling author and mentor, the confidence coach has impacted over 80,000 young lives by making space for children and young people to express their emotions, feelings, and find the confidence they need. For Dale, confidence is a key and virtual quality that must be taught to children and young people – “the architects of our future and role models for their younger generations”. 

You have over a decade of experience as a confidence coach, teaching young people how to find their own voice along their journey of growth. What made you follow this path and how did you realise this was your calling?

Pain. To put it simply. Throughout my adolescent years in education, I was physically and emotionally bullied. Now everyone has a bullying story, whether you were the victim, bully or witness. But, if you have ever been a victim at a young age and unconsciously live with the acceptance that ‘they are better than me, so I shall just put up with it’, then it will damage your living experience. Even worse, you could pass this on to your children. I ever want any child to feel manipulated, controlled, belittled or abused at the hands of unfortunate insecure peers around their age. The key in my 22 years of coaching and impacting children is … confidence. This is what helps a child say “no”, “stop”, “enough man”, and stand up for themselves. When you convert a child’s level of thinking based on their own beliefs and values – not mummy’s or daddy’s – then you see them stand 10 ft tall because they value their own self worth.

Unfortunately for me, I never had a coach to show me the social interaction life ropes and I put up with it. In my career, I was bullied by my deputy head. In my previous relationship, my partner at the time sought physical attention from other men for the entire relationship to which I forgave her for …foolishly, as it occurred numerous times after. When she fell pregnant with another man’s child, enough was enough. But I still went with her to the clinic to terminate it, which broke me.

Over the course of this time I lost my job, I had a car crash, my mum had a heart attack and I was in £15,000 worth of debt taking her off the mortgage. I felt like life was attacking me with no safe way out. Eventually, a now dear friend recommended a coach and after 12 weeks, I was a changed man; growing in confidence, getting my life back together. To prove to myself that I was who I wanted and deserved to be, I applied for a national TV show and won it! Undoubtedly confirming to me that confidence already existed within me, I just had to find the key. Now, it is my responsibility, mission, and privilege to help billions of children find theirs before it’s too late.

Being a coach who inspires hundreds of thousands of students and youths worldwide who will shape our future must be very rewarding. Why is it so important for you to focus your attention on creating a safe space for young people to find confidence in their identity?

Children find it tough to express themselves and when they do, they often get shut down, told to “be quiet”, “sit still” “shhh….concentrate”. I wonder when the education system will recognise that it is crucial for a child to express feelings and emotions with guidance and nurture? Because after teaching for 12 years, I have noticed a huge rise in mental health disorders and this was way before covid. Let’s not forget children are the architects of our future and role models for their younger generations. When a child understands themselves, they operate with an air of certainty and little to no self-consciousness. We need to help them grow in confidence and self assertion for a more sustained future and progressive society.

You have over a decade of experience as a confidence coach teaching young people how to find their own voice along their journey of growth. Can you explain what you might do in a session to help people?

Help them see their miracle. It’s difficult for children not to see themselves as part of a tribe, whether it be a family tribe, friend tribe, class tribe and when children construct this mentality, they cultivate behaviours of just ‘fitting in’. I don’t want children to fit in, I want them to stand out but after years of society, parents, school, and peers condemning them for talking out or acting differently, children get unconsciously locked into this mindset. After impacting over 80,000 children globally, the best way that I have found is to combine the physicality and the psychology to show a child what they are capable of and where to find their confidence within themselves.

When you’ve been faced with challenges, how did you overcome them throughout your journey?

At the time I allowed them to consume me because I had no previous experience of how to deal with these fearful situations. I accidentally stumbled across a Tony Robbins YouTube video, which was incredibly strange because I had never searched his name or personal development prior to this. I felt as if Tony was solely speaking to me, his voice penetrated my being and shook my foundations to the core. It immediately motivated me to take physical action, so I ventured to the gym. In doing so, I bumped into an NLP Master practitioner and the way he articulated sentences with the words he used, again, further blew my mind. He recommended I research personal development and I later met his coach who helped me release my capabilities, my challenges served me and showed a light in the area of my mind that I never knew existed; exposing my confidence and zest for life. This confidence manifested into fearless self belief that I used to apply for a National TV Show called Cannonball. To this day, I cannot explain the thoughts knowing that I was going to win. I actually told the producers before the final that I was going to win and it came from an authentic place in my heart, not arrogance. As you know, the rest is history. I am not telling people around the world to discover their worth, they must win a TV game show, far from it. To discover our worth and grow our courage, we must face our fears and challenges because those challenges are not there to block us. They are our catalysts to greater success.  

Are there any defining moments from your career that stand out from the rest?

Many. But the one that always sticks out to me isn’t speaking in the House of Commons, winning a TV show, hanging out with celebs, speaking around the world or even financial freedom, it’s the messages from children and parents. I received a private message from a once broken parent. Broken due to the suffering and struggle her son was enduring, endless bullying, daily anxiety, and frustration believing they were a “useless” parent for not having the answers. The uselessness could not be further from the truth because this powerful mum reached out to me and after a month, a message popped up on my phone whilst I was having dinner. My partner looked across to me concerned, noticing my crestfallen facial expression and asked me what was wrong. As I began to cry, I explained that nothing was wrong, everything was right as that once broken mum sent me this: “I can honestly say, Dale, that you have saved my son’s life”. These are my defining moments.

You’re a #1 Amazon best seller of Raw Confidence – a book you wrote to your 10-year-old self about how to be unapologetically yourself. What does confidence look like in young people to you?

It’s hidden, unfortunately. Children learn not to show their greatness, they learn that commending themselves is arrogant, they get told to sit still, be quiet, don’t climb, and so much more. It is alarming how adults are placing their own insecurities onto children and it is simply robbing them of their self confidence. A child’s early years should involve as many mistakes, exploratory moments, emotions, new things and relationships as possible. Not barriers or judgement. Give opportunities for children to try new things that require consistent practice. Teach them the value of effort and to strive for their personal best, rather than measure up to someone else’s. It is not quick and certainly not easy, but will take time and consistency. Our role as parents is to support our kids in their efforts, showing them the correlation between effort, and achievement. When this progress occurs, you will see the confidence shining from within. I see confident parents impacting the young lives they have the privilege of guiding by doing it themselves so that the child can absorb. 

How does a lack of confidence and direction impact young people’s mental health?

In my book, I share the 3 main areas that when a child shows confidence in these areas, it will show up for them in life. The 3 S’s are Self, Skill and Social. When we have a healthy relationship and progress with confidence, it will greatly affect our life journey. But, what if we had low self confidence? In my research, I have found that children seek a ‘low confidence confirmation’ in other areas of their life to almost confirm their suspicions and give them the comfort of knowing they were right. This could show up as low self worth, low self esteem, poor self body image and in turn allow others to possibly take advantage of you. It is clear to see that any of the above has a damaging effect on one’s mental health.

The conversation around mental health has always been a taboo one with stigmas attached to people experiencing such hurdles, leaving many to struggle alone. However, in recent years, mental health awareness has been steadily gaining more recognition. What can we as individuals do to facilitate an open and welcoming environment to discuss mental health?

We can understand and respect each other. We must see that everyone on this planet is completely and utterly unique and in that same thread, will have endured many different experiences. Some that challenge, some that hurt and some that power. Either/or each one has helped design the person we are today, and if we can learn to love that person, then we give others permission to love us too. Support, encourage, and motivate others to be better versions of ourselves yesterday. 

By Cynthia Vera

For some, their career path is one that is planned and pursued with the intention of fulfilling this purpose. For Canadian actor, screenwriter and director Bobby Del Rio, the path to the filmmaking industry revealed itself slowly and soon enough, Bobby fell in love with filmmaking.
With a career spreading across two decades, the storyteller follows his heart with every project he takes on like utilising the expressive creativity of screenplays and turning into a theatricalisation of anti-racism and activism.

Now with a foot in the door of Hollywood, Bobby Del Rio will continue to do what he always does: “star in, write, direct and produce whatever” is in his heart. Finding passion to create new stories and share a message with his audience, the actor values the pursuit of purpose in every one of his projects in the film industry. As seen with his new feature film “The Market” that’s been described as “cinematic brilliance” by the Jagran Film Festival.

1.You’re a multi-talented man with a career in the entertainment industry spanning over 20 years, from directing, producing, writing to acting. Where does your story begin within the world of filmmaking? What made you fall in love with entertainment? 

I never intended to become a filmmaker. I worked as the Canadian Feature Film programmer for ReelWorld Film Festival in Toronto. I did that job for 5 years, then fell in love with filmmaking. I loved supporting the work of filmmakers, then decided I wanted to try it myself. 

2.Aside from filmmaking, you’re also involved in theatre with your play “Professionally Ethnic” gaining critical success at the 2017 SummerWorks festival and published in the prestigious Canadian Theatre Review. What was this experience like for you? What motivated you to create a play?

I was a notable anti-racism political activist in my 20s. “Professionally Ethnic” was the theatricalisation of all my activism. I wanted to educate an audience on everything I learned being on the front lines of race politics for so many years.

3.Your most recent project is the well-received feature film “The Market” which you wrote and directed. It’s been called a “cinematic brilliance” by the Jagran Film Festival, so what can you tell us about the film? How did it come to be?  

“The Market” is the film I wanted to make before I died. It was my best play in my 30s, and I wanted people to see my best work. It’s special to me because it took so many years to make, and has subsequently opened more career doors for me than any other of my works. I had never directed a film before when I decided to take that on, but I always believed in my heart I could do it.

4.The Covid-19 pandemic has heavily affected the entertainment industry and put many performers’ lives on hold. How has the pandemic and resulting lockdowns made an impact on your career?

To be honest, the pandemic blew up my entire career. Not sure if it was luck or good timing, but I ended up getting a distribution deal for my film “The Market” at the beginning of the pandemic. And I became one of the top film moderators of Clubhouse by having so much time available to devote to it. While the pandemic has been a terrible time in our history, I have to admit that many good things surprisingly came out of it for me personally.

5.Where do you find inspiration for storytelling?

 Whatever is in my heart.

6.Does your writing process change with every role/project? 

My writing process is fairly consistent. It’s actually quite boring. Once I align a concept with a premise, I write the first draft very quickly. Usually in 3 days or less. Then, I undergo readings with actors, and rewrite until I feel the script is ready to be produced. While my first drafts are known to happen very fast, I take months or years for subsequent readings – based on actor feedback.

7.You’ve had a very impressive career, with credits as the Creator & Showrunner of “IRL the Series”, a director of the short film “Dusk” which was nominated for a 2020 Leo Award, playing the male lead role in both seasons of the web series “My Roommate’s an Escort” , and much more! What moments from your career are most proud of and why?

I’m most proud of any moment in my career that changes somebody’s life in a positive way. While I have been blessed to have lots of individual successes, everything I do is for the audience. If I have helped somebody in the audience move forward in a significant way, I have done my job.

8.Have there any step-backs you’ve had to overcome throughout your journey?

My entire career feels like setbacks. I have had to struggle for every single inch – while at the same time having considerable success. I do believe that success and struggle are tied: if you do not struggle, you cannot know what it takes to succeed.
Our setbacks prepare us for our victories. Nothing comes easy, but everything is possible.

9.What direction do you see your career heading into for the next 20+ years in the filmmaking industry? 

I’m now legitimately starting to work in Hollywood. I will continue to do what I have always done: star in, write, direct and produce whatever is in my heart. I am blessed to be playing at the highest level in the world, and I’m eager to tell important stories to international audiences.

10.With a long and seasoned career, what advice would you give to those wanting to pursue the path of filmmaking and acting? 

My advice would be to chase passion, not stardom. Money & fame come and go, but the work always remains. Those who chase the spotlight are always unhappy, but those of us who tell the stories that scream from our souls are very content. The only reason to be in the film industry is the work itself. The field is too volatile to pursue it for any other reason.

Per was a music teacher when he first realised that everything he knew about the human voice could serve many more people than just his music students. This realisation led him on a different career journey which placed the emphasis on the human voice as a crucially important component for everyone – not just musicians. In this interview he also reveals the importance of voice in the field of business as well as how important our voice is in developing our character and our confidence.

As a ‘Voice Coach’, is it important to have a good voice yourself?

As a coach, to be able to be somewhat of a role model for what you are teaching is definitely important. Then again, we are all unique so we could all have very different opinions of what ‘good’means.  I have trained my own voice extensively and what I would like to encourage everyone is to realise that any voice can be improved significantly. This doesn’t mean we are ‘changing’ your voice or making you sound like someone else. It’s about releasing a greater version of you and of enhancing you. Yes, we are all unique and my job as a coach is not only to improve and free the physical voice, but to free and empower the inner voice.

When did you decide to become a voice coach and how did you first make that decision?

I was a full-time music teacher after high school, mainly because I was already known as a musician. I’ve always loved teaching and coaching to help someone discover their greater abilities within. My method was born out of my experience as a musician, but also from being an elite youth athlete, which made me interested in anatomy as well the aspects of performing under pressure. As I came to Los Angeles from Sweden and began coaching voice, clients were getting wonderful results and I soon realised that I had a unique method in the making.

Can you tell us more about your work with famous singers? How much do you help them and what are their most common requests?

I’ve actually never considered how famous a client is. I am, however, empathetic to the fact that ‘fame’ often adds additional pressure and fears. As I moved away from coaching one-on-one to one-to-many via my online training programs, I seldom know who has done my online training. However, I often receive messages from people who have been helped through the home-study training. That includes high in-demand singers who’ve overcome voice problems through my online training. The most common problem for a high-in demand singer or speaker is indeed when a problem occurs with their voice. Understandably, this causes them enormous pressure and fear, as their livelihood is at stake. Just as for the athlete, we need to heal and condition/strengthen the voice to be able to perform at high levels.

Is it more difficult for you to work with an individual, or work with a famous name?

No, it really makes no difference to me. However, every life situation brings with it different fears and pressures as mentioned above. Much of my training also goes beyond voice training to developing peak performance skills. These are things like becoming a more effective and influential performer/presenter, improving health to be more creative and productive and to be able to perform at high levels on stage and in life. So however famous or successful we might be, we are still just human beings.

As a professional, can you tell us how important communication is, not just in the business world, but also in other areas of life?

Communication is vital and key to any business success in my mind, whether it is to communicate with prospects, customers, business partners or teams. The ability to positively influence, inspire, guide, negotiate, and sell is directly related to your income, as well as to your personal relationships. It all goes hand in hand with how you are able to resonate with the person you communicate with. It’s not necessarily always about what you say, but the resonance and energy of you voice that makes the difference.

How much does the voice help in self-esteem?

Enormously so. Our fear of expressing ourselves may go back to our childhood needs to belong, fit in and be loved. Many times, being silent as a child became a good strategy to not disturb the peace. Many people have grown up with the belief that a child should be seen and not heard, or that their voice and opinions aren’t important.  Likewise, when we experience a problem with our voice, our ability to connect and influence is severely impacted. A restricted voice goes hand in hand with a restricted personality. A timid voice goes hand in hand with a timid personality. A forceful voice goes hand in hand with a forceful personality. A free and resonant voice goes hand in hand with a free and resonant personality. When the voice becomes freer, you become freer and that dramatically affects your confidence, self-esteem, feeling of self-worth, and how others are impacted by you.

Have you ever considered yourself in another profession? If so, what would you do best?

Well, I think that what I do is a blend of many professions. Coach, performer, singer, speaker, media creator, entrepreneur, marketer. Much of my coaching incorporates voice, expression, negotiation, selling, presentation, health, creativity, sleep and also attaining peak performance.

Do you have any messages for all those who are in the first stages of their career? What advice do you have for them?

Implement your ideas in order to discover greater ideas from doing that. Embrace the love and art of constantly learning and discovering. And enjoy the beautiful experience of making a fool out of yourself in the process