emotional intelligence – Global Man

Dr. Bilal Kola: A Lawyer In The Mission To Change The World

Dr Bilal Kola

In a world filled with stories of resilience and triumph, Dr. Bilal’s life journey is a testament to the power of determination, dreams, and the pursuit of justice. Born in an Albanian communist concentration camp, his early years were marked by hardship, but they also sparked a deep desire for success drawn from the pages of Western novels.

Motivated by his family’s legacy of resistance against oppression, he made a vow to study law and fight for justice whenever given the opportunity. His journey took him from Albania to London, where he pursued law studies and specialized in international business law.

Completing a Ph.D. in Strategic Leadership further enhanced his understanding of leadership and shaped his career in both public and private sectors. As Dr. Bilal embarks on a new journey as a motivational speaker and life coach, his story remains an inspiration for those who truly belie­ve in lifelong learning and pursuing their passions.

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Can you share more about your early years growing up in a communist concentration camp and the impact it had on your perspective and drive for success?

Ever since I started to understand and experience the reality it became more and more obvious to me that being treated unfairly and most importantly being treated differently to other kids was something that I had to get used to, as there was nothing I could do to change the reality of it.

Throughout my childhood and adolescence, the phenomenon that caused me the most bitterness, low self-esteem and insecurity was comparing myself to others. I could not even be compared with my peers at the concentration camp. Since the vast majority of the kids at the concentration camp had their father at home, while my father was locked away in political prison.

Other kids at the concentration camp had some of the basics (like food and clothes) while most of the time I went hungry and was wearing ravaged clothes. Then in adolescence, as if putting the seal to everything in relation to comparing myself with others, at the age of 14 as I was prohibited to go to secondary school – I was ordered by the authorities to do heavy labor work in agriculture (during communism internees were categorically prohibited to go to university or college, but they were allowed to go to secondary school – so my case was a special exemption from the exclusionary rule itself).

To this extremely burdened emotional state (due to comparing myself with others) it just thankfully happened that I found the ‘cure’ through what I now call the phenomenon of ‘escaping into books’. So, by reading various novels of western authors (which were indeed very hard to find back in communist Albania), I was inspired and aspired to become like their characters.

My desire to achieve success (to become knowledgeable, articulate, polite, famous, rich, etc) has been a deeply ingrained mindset that I have cultivated since my childhood in trying to emulate my role models exemplified in the characters of western authors.

Your family’s history is marked by opposition to the communist regime. How did your family’s experiences influence your academic and career choices, especially in the field of law?

While in the concentration camp, during my early teen years my biggest and wildest dream was to flee Albania and go to the US to study law and become a lawyer. My grandfather had been shot without trial by the communist dictatorship just for being a good patriot and collaborating with British SOEs against Nazis (even though he was someone who had been graduated as a student in Austria), my dad was locked away in a political prison (just for being courageous enough to speak his mind) since I was two years old, my family was exiled in various concentration camps since May 1945.

All these injustices had me fired up inside, instilling a deep passion about law and justice. So, I had sworn to myself – if I ever got free there was no other choice for me but law.

Tell us about the pivotal moments or individuals who inspired you to pursue a career in law and international business law, considering your challenging beginnings.

As I said before, the severe injustices that my family had been subjected to and all the deprivations that I had experienced throughout my childhood and adolescence, had me deeply fired up inside for justice. So, I’ve always felt that given the chance, studying law and becoming a lawyer was the right tool how I could give my contribution to my family and my people.

Thankfully, when communism fell, I was so adamant to fulfill this dream of mine. In 1993, Lord Julian Emery (a friend of my grandfather) came to Albania receiving a medal from the Albanian president of that time. My father met him and thereafter my dream started to become a reality.

So, I started my law studies in London. After finishing my bachelor studies, living in the financial capital of Europe led me thinking that focusing on international business law would give me a competitive edge when I returned to Albania (the scholarship I got with the help from Lord Emery had a condition that after finishing school I had to return to Albania, so I had to honor that commitment I took in front of him).

Your academic journey is quite diverse, from law to international business and aviation law. How did these different areas of study complement each other in shaping your career?

Ever since I returned to Albania I’ve engaged in various interesting projects and works, but all of them revolving on commercial and corporate law. I had the opportunity to study international aviation law while I was working as director legal for the German company operating Tirana airport.

I think that I’ve always held an interest in expanding my professional knowledge and whenever an opportunity has arisen, I’ve never had any hesitation to go for it.

You completed your PhD in Strategic Leadership. How has this advanced degree contributed to your leadership roles, both in the public and private sectors?

Again the PhD in Strategic Leadership was something of an opportunity to me. When I was director legal at the airport company, it just happened that I was went to Vienna very frequently as I was representing my company in an international arbitration case.

In Vienna I’ve met a lot of interesting and influential people and one of them introduced me this opportunity to study for my PhD. But instead of paying the tuition to the university, I could contribute in kind (like a barter transaction) in giving lectures at the same university for its undergraduates in business law.

My PhD degree in Strategic Leadership has been a massive help in structuring and refining my practical knowledge about leadership and making significant strides in my career (I believe leadership skills have a tremendous impact in all walks of life, both professional and personal).

Could you elaborate on your motivation for enrolling in the Executive Coaching program? How do you plan to integrate coaching into your career trajectory?

In the last couple of years I felt that I have taken and given as much as I could in my legal career. So, without saying I’ve felt bored with law it may be worth saying that recently I’ve felt that I have so much more to contribute – beyond being a lawyer – to give and share with enthusiasm and passion with the world about my professional and personal life experiences.

So, as a blueprint for I plan in my career I’ve written a book in the genre of personal development, titled: ’12 MINDSETS to improve life radically’. My career goal now (for which I have a tremendous passion to share with as many people as possible) is to become an international motivational speaker and life coach. However, given the fact that throughout my career I have worked with executives (being one myself for many years) and knowing what motivates them, knowing theirs challenges and goals, I think makes me much more suitable to initially coach them.

Hence, enrolling onto an accredited ICF Executive Coaching program I feel is the right approach for my credentials as a life coach and motivational speaker.

Starting your own law firm is a significant achievement. What were the biggest challenges you faced during this entrepreneurial journey, and what advice would you offer to aspiring entrepreneurs?

Judged by my experience, I believe that the biggest challenge an entrepreneur faces is making the decision to start out (when I’ve took the decision to start my own law firm I had a very well-paid job, but I also had much higher ambitions that I somehow wanted to fulfill).

My advice is simple (but maybe not easy): (i) focus on your passions, talents or skills; (ii) come up with a well-structured SMART goal; (iii) be courageous to take that crucial first step; (iv) persist no matter what, because perseverance is always associated with the ‘lucky breaks’; (iv) work very hard until your expertise and reputation will make you work smart.

Then you will most likely experience the true self-actualization. Just like Confucius said: ‘when we do for work something we like, we never work a single day in our life’.

As a motivational speaker and coach, you inspire others to improve their lives. Can you share a few of your key “mindsets” for personal development that have resonated most with your audiences?

On a personal development level I love to share with my audiences how they can cultivate and practice the concepts and wisdom associated with: acceptance and Amor Fati, forgiving everyone and anything, equanimity, gratitude, etc.

On a professional development level, I love to share with them how they can learn and apply the soft skills of leadership, emotional intelligence, public communication, persuasion and negotiation – combining them with the mindsets of ‘every failure is stepping stone to success’, not comparing our first chapter with somebody’s tenth chapter, Ikigai (purpose), etc.

Your involvement in organizations like the Albanian-British Chamber of Commerce and the International Lawyers Association is impressive. How has networking and being part of these associations influenced your career?

Life has taught me to truly believe in this wonderful and wise saying (not only in a financial sense but in its entire dimension): ‘your network is your net worth’.

So, I’m truly blessed to know so many wonderful, kind and talented individuals as a result of my professional networking. It gives me great satisfaction to acknowledge to them (or sharing with others) any contribution (no matter small or big) that I’ve had from anyone of them in my career advancement.

You’ve been an external university professor in Business Law for many years. What aspects of teaching and mentoring students do you find most rewarding, and how does it complement your other professional endeavours?

I love teaching and mentoring for two main reasons: (i) because of the direct positive contribution I have on the life of the students (I actually experience the so-called ‘giver’s high’ when I teach and mentor); and (ii) because I firmly believe in the saying ‘who teaches others, also teaches himself’.

So, my teaching and mentoring always keeps me updated, ‘on my feet’, and what I truly love to be for myself – a life-long student.

Dr Bilal Kola

Balthasar Fleischmann: My ICE Method — Lessons from My 35 Years in Law Enforcement

Balthasar Fleischmann

Balthasar Fleischmann is an exceptional speaker who provides invaluable insights into effective communication and conflict resolution. Drawing on his extensive experience as a seasoned police officer and undercover agent with 35 years of experience, Balthasar is a highly sought-after speaker for events focused on these topics.

Balthasar’s speeches are not only informative but also highly engaging, with practical advice that audiences can implement immediately. He understands the importance of choosing the right words and how they can impact communication effectiveness. Balthasar’s ICE method, a practical tool for decision-making and effective communication, has been proven in a variety of settings to improve communication and achieve successful outcomes.

In addition to his expertise in verbal communication, Balthasar understands the importance of nonverbal communication and how it can convey authenticity and build rapport. He provides audiences with practical advice on how to use body language to enhance communication effectiveness.

Balthasar Fleischmann’s speeches are a must-attend for those looking to improve their communication skills and achieve successful outcomes. Book him as a speaker for your next event to gain valuable insights and take your communication skills to the next level.

“I faced many challenging situations, but I managed them all without resorting to violence. I arrested murderers and caught thieves, but saving lives was certainly the best task and guiding people on the right path with my influence.”
Balthasar Fleischmann

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What inspired you to become a police officer and undercover agent, and how did you get started in this line of work?

In my personal experience of 35 years, many people become police officers because they want to serve their communities and make a positive impact. Some are drawn to the challenges and adrenaline of undercover work. For me, it was the desire to serve people with all my competence. I changed to the special unit after creating the concept for this unit. So, I was the first to be there.

What were some of the most challenging situations you encountered during your time as a police officer and undercover agent, and how did you handle them?

Police officers and undercover agents face a wide range of challenges, from dealing with dangerous criminals to managing high-pressure situations that require quick decision-making. I faced many challenging situations, but I managed them all without resorting to violence. I arrested murderers and caught thieves, but saving lives was certainly the best task and guiding people on the right path with my influence.

How do you train individuals to effectively use communication as a weapon in difficult situations, and what are some of the key skills that are required?

Effective communication skills are essential for police officers and anyone dealing with difficult situations. It’s about controlling your emotions and not being driven by anger or rage. One rule I always follow is to separate the person from their actions, focusing on the action and recognizing that there is a human being behind it with their own reasons. This allows for a better response and better control of the situation.

Can you share some examples of how the ICE method has been used successfully in business negotiations or employee conversations?

My ICE method (Identify, Corporate, and Eliminate) can be used in a variety of settings to improve communication and achieve successful outcomes. For example, in business negotiations, using this ICE method can help parties identify the key issues at hand, clarify their positions, and consider the consequences of their decisions. I give examples and tools in my seminars to help participants understand and apply my ICE method effectively.

How can individuals learn to control their emotions in challenging situations, and what role does self-awareness play in this process?

Controlling emotions in challenging situations is important for maintaining clear thinking and making sound decisions. Self-awareness is a key component of this process, as it allows individuals to recognize and manage their emotions effectively. Techniques such as deep breathing, visualization, and mindfulness can also be helpful in controlling emotions and staying calm under pressure. Training in emotional intelligence and stress management can be beneficial as well.

What are some of the common misconceptions about communication and conflict resolution, and how do you address them in your seminars and workshops?

One common misconception is that communication always involves compromise or finding a middle ground. However, this is not always the case, and sometimes one party may need to take a firm stance to protect their interests or boundaries. In my seminars and workshops, I address this misconception by teaching individuals to focus on their own needs and communicate them effectively, while also being open to hearing the other party’s perspective. I provide tools and methods that challenge traditional thinking and offer new perspectives.

How can individuals identify and remove unhelpful words from their vocabulary, and what impact can this have on their communication effectiveness?

Individuals can identify unhelpful words in their vocabulary by becoming more aware of their own language patterns and paying attention to how others respond to their words. Some common unhelpful words include blaming language, negative self-talk, and generalizations. Removing these words from their vocabulary and replacing them with more positive and constructive language can have a significant impact on their communication effectiveness. In our workshops, we help participants identify these unhelpful words and understand why they use them. We then work on replacing them with beneficial terms. As a result, participants report ongoing success and improved communication.

How do you approach situations where the other person is not willing to communicate, and what strategies can be employed in these scenarios?

Communication cannot be forced. Instead, we can try to understand the motivation behind the other person’s unwillingness to communicate and work on changing that motivation or showing them a new perspective. Active listening and creating a safe space for them to express themselves can be helpful. However, if these approaches do not work, it may be necessary to disengage and return to the conversation at a later time. Strategies such as mediation or involving a neutral third party can also be employed to resolve the conflict.

How can individuals develop their body language skills to effectively communicate their message and convey authenticity?

Developing body language skills involves being aware of one’s own nonverbal cues, such as facial expressions, tone of voice, and posture, and learning to read the nonverbal cues of others. Practicing active listening, maintaining eye contact, and using open body language can all help to convey authenticity and build rapport in communication. In our seminars, we go beyond basic body language and expand participants’ perception of themselves. We bring their body language into consciousness, work on exercises, and ensure that their body language is authentic and aligned with their message.

What advice do you have for individuals who are looking to improve their conflict resolution and communication skills, both in their personal and professional lives?

My advice for individuals looking to improve their conflict resolution and communication skills is to practice active listening, become more aware of their own language patterns, and approach difficult conversations with an open mind and a willingness to learn. Seeking out training or coaching from experienced professionals in this field can also be helpful. Effective communication and conflict resolution are skills that can be developed over time with practice and dedication. Additionally, I recommend using my ICE method as a practical tool for decision-making and effective communication. We provide support and guidance at the Decisionairs Academy, and we look forward to assisting you on your journey.

Explore More Of Balthasar and Contact Him on LinkedIn:

Balthasar Fleischmann | LinkedIn